The Companion Picture - REVIEW THIS STORY

Written by Dandelion
Last updated: 12/03/2009 06:26:08 PM

Chapter 14

Kitty walked through the sterile halls of the Muir Isle facility on her way to Peter's room. She was surprised as to how close it was to hers. She had to give Peter credit, he had given her a wide berth since his disastrous arrival. He hadn't pushed her since she verbally bashed him in the containment cell.

It was probably killing him. Peter hated leaving things hanging. He had probably wanted to talk to Kitty long since that day, but the others talked him out of it.

<I guess it was the right thing,> she thought. <I mean, how receptive would I have been to him? I probably needed to come to this point on my own. Get over my anger and the hurt.>

She reached his door and knocked.

Peter's muffled voice said the door was open.

Kitty steeled herself and went in. Peter was sitting by the window, sketch pad in hand. There were canvases and paints spread across the room. A newly started painting of Moira sat in the corner. Kitty wasn't sure how to react, she had figured that Peter has long since given up his artwork.

He shut off everything when Illyana died, sometimes Kitty wondered if Illyana hadn't been the only person that died that day. Peter hastily got to his feet when he saw Kitty.

"Katya," he looked around sheepishly. "I apologize for the mess, I-I wasn't expecting anyone."

Kitty smiled, "Come on, Peter. You don't have to make a big spectacle for me."

"I think maybe I do," Peter gestured to the bed for her to sit. "I'm afraid all of my chairs are being used as easels."

Kitty nodded and sat, looking at the many canvases that were scattered about. It wasn't just Moira's portrait, but Kurt's, a dual of Meggan and Brian, and one that looked very much like Magneto. "I can't tell you, Peter, how glad I am to see that you're painting again."

Peter looked embarrassed. "I should never have given it up, it seems to be all I have left of who I was."

Kitty pulled her knees up to her chin. "You're the same, aren't you, Peter?" She smiled at him knowingly.

He looked at her. "I think you know better than to ask that, Katya. You saw me when you called me to Muir Isle those many months ago. You saw me when I returned."

Kitty nodded. "I suppose. When did you do that portrait of Kurt?"

Peter grinned, looking pleased. "I burned the last portrait I did of Kurt, I wanted to make another to take its place. The thing is, I don't paint the way I used to."

"I see that," Kitty looked at Kurt's portrait and was astonished at the change in Peter's style. "But, you've changed, so it really isn't surprising."

Peter nodded. "I remember the last one I did of him was more...innocent. I didn't see Kurt then the way I do now."

"It looks exactly like him, I think," Kitty offered. "It shows his strength rather than just the happy side of him. The last one was whimsical almost. Of course, Kurt really didn't take himself so seriously then. He played a role in New York, balancing out Wolverine and Storm and you. Now, he leads us. You captured that perfectly."

"Thank you. I'm proud of it, I was thinking of giving it to him for his birthday." Peter touched the canvas lightly.

"Kurt will love it," Kitty could see Kurt's reaction perfectly. He'd be flustered and moved and spend hours finding the perfect place for it.

"What were you working on when I came in?" Peter looked hesitant, but handed the sketchbook to Kitty in silence.

She looked at the page and caught her breath, "Oh! It's 'Yana." She stared at the page, looking at Illyana as a teenager, with her luminescent eyes and double-daring smile. Kitty turned silently and sat back on the bed. "It's so much like her. I feel as though she could burst out laughing any minute."

She felt a tightness in her throat and a dreadful hot feeling in her lungs. "Oh Peter," she burst out. "I miss her so much!!" She covered her eyes and sobbed.

Peter had no idea what to do. There was a time when he would have thought nothing of comforting Kitty, but things had changed so much he wasn't sure if he would be welcome or not.

Things changed, yes, but he couldn't sit there and watch Kitty cry without doing anything about it. He sat next to her and put his arm around her shoulders. She fell against his chest and wept. "I thought I could deal with, it's been so long. I miss her, I miss her everyday."

Peter nodded, feeling tired inside from missing his sister so much. "I know," was all he could manage.

She pulled back, eyes flashing, "And what about *you*, Peter?!" she raged at him. "I lost my two best friends in the same day! 'Yana didn't have a choice, but *you* did!!"

Peter removed his arm from Kitty's shoulders and went back to his seat by the window. He regarded Kitty from there, his eyes red. "Words aren't going to change what happened, Katya. I was wrong, but it was all I could manage at the time. I couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't stand there and be the same ever faithful Peter that I've been since I came to the X-Men. Not everyone understands. I had a family, Katya. I left my family behind because I thought I had a duty to the world. I left them behind and I lost each one. One after the other, do you have *any* idea what that feels like?"

Kitty wiped her eyes. "I know exactly how that feels. It sounds like how I felt when I watched you all die in Dallas."

Peter bowed his head. "I wish I had known what was going to happen there. If I had known I had so little time with Illyana, I would never have agreed to hide from the world. Storm said we had to make sacrifices, everyone had to separate themselves from the members of the team that weren't with us. We all missed you and Kurt, but Illyana was different. She's my family."

Kitty shook her head. "Ororo thought she was doing the right thing."

"Storm was *with* the people she loved, Katya. She was with the X-Men. I am certain she missed Forge and you, but she has no family but us. She lost out on very little. Turn back a few pages and see Illyana as she was the last time I saw her as a grown up."

Kitty looked down at the sketchbook and flipped through it. Illyana, soulsword in hand, wearing her eldritch armor, looked a frightening picture. Her eyes black, her legs turned to goat's legs with cloven hooves. Two horns sprouting from her forehead. "Darkchilde," she whispered.

"She was willing to turn herself over to her Darkchilde persona completely just to conjure up my ghost," Peter murmured quietly. "Storm never understood what that meant. I imagine she still doesn't. I didn't then, but I do now. She was that wounded by our 'deaths', she had given up everything else. Even Magneto, who tried to help her keep Darkchilde at bay. I understand now, I'd be happy to turn myself over to darkness if it meant seeing Illyana again. I can't do that, though, so instead, I turned to the things that made her happy."

"Like your art," Kitty nodded. She looked up at him. "Peter, you and I knew her and loved her like no one else did. Promise me that you won't turn away from the memories again. Promise me that we can keep her alive between us."

"I've stopped running, Katya."

Kitty was silent for a time, she handed

Peter's sketchbook back to him. "What do you think of the news about Rogue?"

Peter smiled, "I think it's about time."

Kitty nodded, "Yeah, after all she's been through, I guess she finally decided to do something about her feelings for Gambit."

"Oh, *that* one," Peter rolled his eyes. "I imagine no one else would do for Rogue. She is the adventurous type."

"Storm likes him."

"She is another adventurous type. Some people are very well suited for each other, for others it's not so easy."

Kitty smiled, "Being introspective, Peter?"

"I suppose."

She nodded, understanding his meaning. "I sometimes think back to our lives back at the mansion, I wonder how things would have ended if the smallest thing had been different."

"I was, as Rogue would say, a big, dumb guy," Peter offered. He leaned back in his chair and looked out the window. "I came from a very small world and was suddenly thrust into one bigger and more diverse than I had ever imagined. I met this little, slip of a girl, as delicate as a flower, and I felt completely intimidated by her, and I fell madly in love with her." He grinned, looking at Kitty self-consciously.

Kitty turned red, "Me? You were intimidated by me? Why?"

"You were worldly," Peter mumbled.

Kitty's laugh rang out loudly. "Me?! Are you sure this is *me* you're talking about?"

"Katya, in all seriousness, there was always a great deal to admire about you. I wasn't the only one who saw it."

Kitty looked at the ceiling, "I wish you had pointed some of those admirers out to me after we broke up, I think I could have used them then. I mean, at the time, everyone wanted to get close to 'Yana. I was a brainiac."

"I always thought you were very smart, and very beautiful."

"Stop it," Kitty blushed again. "You're embarrassing me."

"Good," Peter grinned at her. "Anyway, look around. Apparently, Pete Wisdom has found you worth admiring, hmm?"

Kitty cleared her throat, feeling uncomfortable hearing her first love talk about her current flame. "Yeah, Pete's a real interesting guy."

"That I have discovered," Peter nodded. He rubbed his chin, "In all honesty, he reminds me a great deal of Logan. I rather hated Logan when I first met him, you know."

"A lot of people did," Kitty nodded. She wasn't too sure about Peter's linking Logan and Pete together. It was something she hadn't thought about very much.

"If he's good to you, Katya, then I have no arguments. I'd rather you be happy than anything else."

Kitty lifted her chin, "Well, not like it's up to you or anything..." She looked up and saw Peter grinning mischievously. "You're goading me!"

"In fun," Peter held his hands up in truce.

"In all seriousness, Katya, I do have something important to say to you."

She looked at him, all sorts of ideas flashed through her mind; from his raging at her like he did when he arrived to taking her in his arms and kissing the heck out of her. She waited.

"I'm sorry."

Kitty looked at him, expecting more to come,

but nothing did. "Sorry for what?"

"For everything. All the things that I said and shouldn't have or the things I should have said and didn't. The things I did and should have done. All of it."

Kitty shook her head. "Peter, I've missed you."

"I'd apologize to Wisdom as well if I thought it would do anything."

Kitty laughed, "It probably wouldn't." She paused, looking at him, tilting her head. "You're so different now, you look the same, in some ways you *are* the same, but at the same time there are parts of you, inside, that have changed so much."

Peter nodded, "Avalon opened my eyes. In all honesty, I'm glad I went. It made some things very clear. It gave me a new perspective."

"Hm," Kitty stood up. "Peter, promise me you aren't going to shut me out again. I can't lose my best friend again."

"I've learned, I don't plan on shutting you away, Katya. You are far too precious to me for that."

Kitty smiled nervously, and headed to the door. She paused and looked over her shoulder at Peter, still sitting at the window. "You don't have to avoid me anymore."

He nodded, "See you later, Katya."

"You talked to Peter, didn't you?" Kurt joined Kitty as she walked along the grounds.

"Yeah," Kitty answered, distracted.

Kurt dove forward and walked on his hands for several feet, "And? Are your demons laid to rest?"

Kitty stopped, "No, they're more restless than ever."

Kurt straightened, "What happened?"

"He was wonderful, and open, and understanding, and generous, and altogether the Peter of my dreams. This is *so* *frustrating*, why can't he be unstable like he was when he got here? Why did he have to be so unbelievably gracious? He was like Prince Charming, but better. This bites!"

Kurt scratched his head, "Katzchen, I'm confused. Did your talk go well or not?"

"It went well, Kurt. I was amazed as to how well he's doing, and how stable he is, compared to how he was when he arrived."

"Well, it *has* been awhile. Peter needed the stability of people who loved him, and he needed rest. He has those things. Why wouldn't he be stable?"

Kitty shrugged and nudged the dirt on the path around with her toe. "I can understand why he was so sweet, I mean, he's been through his hell. He survived and now, he's okay. It's like he's stronger and more sure of himself than he ever was. And now, I'm stuck with being swept away by how wonderful he was and I can't stand it."

Kurt laughed, "Why on earth not?"

"Because, I'm with *Pete* now! That's why!" Kitty ran her fingers through her hair. "Peter was so sweet and generous that through the entire conversation I completely forgot about the guy in the wheelchair that I am currently involved with! For heaven's sake, Kurt, *Peter* is the one who brought him up!! I mean, what does that say about me? And I *know* that Peter isn't doing this on purpose, and I know he isn't trying to manipulate me or anything, he's just being honest and good. I don't know. I mean, if he keeps this Prince Charming thing going, I may swoon for him in front of Pete and that won't be good."

Kurt looked serious, "Katzchen, listen to me. This is very important. Step back and look at what is going on. Please keep in mind that there is so much you and Peter have left unresolved. There are so many feelings between you. You weren't only in love, you were friends, dear, close friends. And please don't underestimate the effect that Illyana had on both your lives. You two knew her better than everyone and her loss effected the two of you more."

Kitty groaned, "I know. I know. I look at him and I see her, but it doesn't hurt as much. It's like he's her presence, but there to comfort me instead of hurt me. Kurt, what if I fall in love with him all over again? I thought I was over him."

"No one ever gets completely over their first love."

"Oh. Thanks. That helps," she grumbled.

Kurt laughed. "Katzchen, you don't have to decide this now. Take your time. Too many of us have rushed into things and we've paid for it. Just, take everything slow. Peter and Wisdom will both survive if you choose the other."

"Thanks a lot!!"

Kurt shook his head, "Dearest Kitty, don't take it so hard. You know my heart would be broken in two if you ever left me."

"You old smoothie," Kitty smiled. She hugged her old friend and let her harried thoughts drift away to worry about another day.